Shit My Dad Says

Author: Justin Halpern
Editor: Pan Macmillan
ISBN: 9780752227405
Size: 14,38 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
Read: 325
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'At 28 years old, I found myself living at home, with my 73-year-old father. As a child, my father never minced words, and when I screwed up, he had a way of cutting right through the bullshit and pointing out exactly why I was being an idiot. When I moved back in I was still, for the most part, an idiot. But this time, I was smart enough to write down all the things he said to me…' Meet Justin Halpern and his dad. Almost one million people follow Mr Halpern’s philosophical musings every day on Twitter, and in this book, his son weaves a brilliantly funny, touching coming-of-age memoir around the best of his sayings. What emerges is a chaotic, hilarious, true portrait of a father and son relationship from a major new comic voice. As Justin says at one point, his dad is ‘like Socrates, but angrier, and with worse hair’; and this is the sort of shit he says… ‘You know, sometimes it’s nice having you around. But now ain’t one of those times. Now gimmie the remote, we’re not watching this bullshit.’ ‘Happy Birthday, I didn’t get you a present… Oh, mom got you one? Well, that’s from me then, too – unless it’s shitty.’ ‘Your brother brought his baby over this morning. He told me it could stand. It couldn’t stand for shit. Just sat there. Big let down.’ ‘The worst thing you can be is a liar . . . Okay, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2.’ ‘Why the f**k would I want to live to 100? I’m 73 and shit’s starting to get boring. By the way, there’s no money left when I go, just fyi.’

Sh T My Dad Says

Author: Justin Halpern
Editor: Harper Collins
ISBN: 0062002945
Size: 15,14 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
Read: 674
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“This book is ridiculously hilarious, and makes my father look like a normal member of society.” —Chelsea Handler “Read this unless you’re allergic to laughing.” —Kristen Bell “If you’re wondering if there is a real man behind the quotes on Twitter, the answer is a definite and laugh-out-loud yes.” —Christian Lander, New York Times bestselling author of Stuff White People Like Tuesdays with Morrie meets F My Life in this hilarious book about a son’s relationship with his foul-mouthed father by the 29-year-old comedy writer who created the massively popular Twitter feed of the same name.

More Shit My Dad Says

Author: Justin Halpern
Editor: Pan Macmillan
ISBN: 1447248953
Size: 13,25 MB
Format: PDF
Read: 640
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‘Human beings fear the unknown. So, whatever's freaking you out, grab it by the balls and say hello. Then it ain't the unknown anymore and it ain't scary. Or I guess it could be a sh*tload scarier’ Sam Halpern Soon after Sh*t My Dad Says began to take off, comic writer Justin Halpern decided to take the plunge and propose to his then girlfriend. But before doing so, he asked his dad's advice, which was very, very simple (and surprisingly clean): 'Just take a day to think about it.' This book is the story of that trip down memory lane, a toe-curlingly honest pilgrim’s progress of teenage relationships, sex and love by one of the funniest writers at work today. Sh*t people say about Justin Halpern: ‘Ridiculously hilarious’ Chelsea Handler ‘Shoot-beer-out-your-nose funny’ Maxim ‘Funny, silly, honest, lively and fresh’ Sunday Times

My Dad Says Yes

Author: Calvin Denson
Editor:
ISBN: 9781952320279
Size: 20,92 MB
Format: PDF, Docs
Read: 669
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Life is good in the eyes of little Henry and for the most of it, it's good because Henry's dad is awesome and always spends quality time with him. Yes, moms are cool too but, in this book, little Henry is going to let the world know that his dad loves him and he shows it by saying, "Yes!"

My Dad Says

Author: John E. Fry
Editor:
ISBN: 9780967427904
Size: 14,37 MB
Format: PDF, Docs
Read: 440
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My Dad Thinks He S Funny

Author: Katrina Germein
Editor: Candlewick Press
ISBN: 0763665223
Size: 17,58 MB
Format: PDF
Read: 738
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A gift-appropriate story for kids features a long-suffering boy's eye-rolling observations of his father's bombastic and often corny sense of humor, which is comprised of groan-out-loud puns and wisecracking rejoinders.

My Dad Always Says

Author: Constance Octavia Dixon
Editor: Constance Octavia Dixon
ISBN:
Size: 20,49 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
Read: 226
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Constance Dixon provides skillful nuggets to put in your tool box to help develop and elevate, inspire and transform your life. Pulled from recorded short conversations with her dad, this book will leave you mentally refreshed and inspired to live your most authentic life. Be prepared to be touch by My Dad Always says..

Just Like Dad Says

Author: Geoff Tibballs
Editor: Random House
ISBN: 1407027646
Size: 12,95 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
Read: 109
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'I won't lie to you, fatherhood isn't easy like motherhood' Homer Simpson Fathers come in many guises - wise or silly, strict or kind. They can make you laugh and they can make you cringe. They can drive you home and they can drive you mad ... In Just Like Dad Says, wise and witty words from the likes of Billy Connolly, Jerry Seinfeld, Spike Milligan and Homer Simpson cover everything from the joy of being a new dad to waving kids off as they - finally - leave home. Old and new, laugh-out-loud funny or wickedly dry, Just Like Dad Says is the best ever collection of quotes by and about Dad. 'My father only hit me once - but he used a Volvo' Bob Monkhouse 'Even very young children need to be informed about dying. Explain the concept of death very carefully to your child. This will make threatening him with it much more effective' P.J. O'Rourke

My Dad Says I Could Sing Before I Could Talk If That S Possible I Was Always Humming And Things Like That Miley Cyrus

Author: Quotes Design
Editor:
ISBN:
Size: 12,65 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
Read: 905
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JUST FOR YOU ! A Simple Lined NoteBook, But the quote is Legendary Your GORGEOUS notebook is here! Great with neon, metallic, glitter, pastel, fluorescent, or other gel pens! It's time to up-level make your note taking stand out from the crowd. Featuring lightly lined college ruled pages on unique cover, this notebook is versatile and unique. A perfect gift to the person who wants to stand out from the crowd. Makes a great notebook for gratitude journaling, list making, taking notes, or jotting things down. FEATURES: premium matte cover printed on high quality interior stock convenient 6" x 9" size 120 lightly lined pages perfect with gel pens designed by a mother of 4 in the U.S.A. "Quotes are always the legacy of legends" You Deserve It (All Vectors Used for Our Brand By Vecteezy.com)